Pointless Technologies

I rely on—and generally love—technology. I can’t imagine life without the internet, I already depend heavily on my new iPod touch, and most of the jobs I’ve done (writing, video editing, etc.) have a significant tech component.

However, there are also some really pointless uses of technology. Despite promising to save time, make life more convenient, or whatever, they actually just cause problems. Yet, somehow, they prevail. I’m not taking about those silly things that people invent, put on late night commercials, and then fail to actually sell. I’m also not talking about great ideas by major companies that just didn’t catch on (Apple, for example, has created a lot of things that didn’t catch on, but it’s also managed to produce paradigm-changing products at the same time. I’m also not talking about the iPad, because the jury is still out on that and though I don’t have one, I like them.) Instead, I’m talking about things that lots of people use, but which aren’t actually saving time, or even benefiting people much.

So here are a few examples:

Weed wackers: When I was a teenager I always had to mow and edge our yard. I really hated it. Now that I’ve moved back into my parents house, that has apparently become my job once again. However, while the lawnmower works well enough, I was surprised this week to see just how aggravating the weed wacker still is. It’s a gas-powered machine, and it uses those green plastic cords to cut the grass. To use it, you wrap the cord around a spool, and then to feed more cord out you bump the spool on the ground. (The ones I've used are similar to the one pictured below, but are also not that exact model.)

Whether that makes sense or not, the point is that it doesn’t even remotely work like it's supposed to. As you can imagine, a thin plastic cord constantly hitting rocks, cement, etc. wears down quickly. However, the machine that my parents have hardly ever feeds more cord out properly. That means that literally every five minutes you have take the thing apart and manually pull out more cord.

The result is that a job that should take 20 minutes ends up taking hours. There are many solutions to this problem, but the easiest would just be for some one to invent a weed wacker/edger that actually works.

Dishwashers: Dishwashers might be my most hated appliance ever invented. They seem so promising: no one likes washing dishes and a machine that would do it for you would be great.

The problem is that no dishwasher I’ve ever seen actually works. First, you basically have to wash all the dishes hand before putting them in the dishwasher. Then, somehow, there is still food stuck all over the supposedly cleaned dishes. I’ve lived in lots of houses and apartments, and without fail that’s the outcome I’ve experienced. And while I have no doubt that there are probably some super powered (and super expensive) dishwashers that actually work, I’m yet to see them in action.

The funny thing is that it’s also pretty easy to wash dishes hand. Most people are already doing it, but without soap, so that their dishwashers will work. For some reason, however, there seems to be a mistaken impression that machines are getting dishes more sanitary or clean, simply because they’re machines.

Rice cookers: This may be a controversial choice for this list, because most rice cookers I’ve seen do work, and many people love them. However, what are they really doing? To cook rice, you literally just have to boil it in a pot with water. That means that a rice cooker is just a pot with a timer on it. They may save some time by going marginally faster, but they also sacrifice some freedom: you can’t test and season rice as easily when it’s locked in a machine.

Bread machines: Bread machines are like a cruel joke. They make something that looks and deliciously smells like bread, but that typically is a monumental disappointment. The vast majority of bread machine bread that I’ve had have a bland flavor, overcooked crumbly crust, and a far too airy interior. Maybe those things are the result of bad recipes, but time and again I’ve had disappointing bread machine bread from different people and in different settings. It’s usually on par with the cheapest store bought stuff, but coupled with the smell of home cooked bread, it's infinitely more disappointing.

This list could go on and on, but the point here is that everything doesn’t need to be mechanized, and that some modern machines are just producing awful simulacra of good things.

Sprinklers

I'd like to propose that everyone stop using automated and/or timed sprinklers to water grass at private residences.  This proposal would save water and money, prevent unnecessary water damage, and would have the collateral benefit of enhancing the emotional and psychological connections between people and the spaces they inhabit. 

 

This proposal stems from daily observations of sprinklers spraying all sorts of things that should not be watered.  I like to go running at night.  Tonight for example, I left for a run at 12:15 AM.  During that run I was sprayed by sprinklers close to two dozen times.  It wasn’t unpleasant, but it means that all those sprinklers were hitting the sidewalk or street.  Judging from the houses as I ran by, I don’t think that most people were awake at 12:15 AM.  In turn, I’m led to believe that all those sprinkler systems are automated or timed.  So either most people don’t know that they are wasting all that water, or they don’t care (some people seem to purposely set their sprinklers higher than needed so they can water the main lawn as well as the strip of grass between the sidewalk and street at the same time.  If you’re doing that, please stop.  It’s extremely discourteous to the community, pedestrians, and the environment.)

 

If we’re going to have lawns, I recommend we hand water them with the hose.  This can be great fun for kids, and will waste less water to evaporation than those counterintuitive misting sprinklers so many people have.   If we must use sprinklers, please monitor them yourself.  If they're broken and gushing water, fix them or turn them off.  If they're spraying the street or parked cars, fix their aim.  If it’s raining outside, you probably don’t need them that day.  Yes, this will take time and effort.  But the rewards will be worth it.  Plus, I think that if we take greater responsibility for what is going on in our yards and our world we will enjoy a greater sense of satisfaction in numerous other aspects of our lives.     

 

If we’re talking about lawns, I have to mention that environmental experts point out that lawns are one of the most wasteful ways to use water, especially in desert regions.  Though I agree with this, I also recognize that it will be a long time, if ever, that people give up grass.  I also think that there is something to be said for having aesthetically pleasing plants around a house that also keep down dust.  In any case, there are big steps we could take to improve the environment (like eliminating grass completely), but in the mean time if we all tried a little bit harder to be frugal with our water we’d start seeing big results.  (Also, it would of course be better if everyone had a garden instead of a lawn.  However, most people are locked in jobs that prevent them from spending adequate time on gardens and I would thusly blame the capitalist economy for the lack of gardens.  I would also blame capitalism for the proliferation of the suburbs, which epitomize lawn-culture.  This is really a topic for a different post, but my point is that criticizing lawn-oriented water consumption addresses the symptoms of a larger problem, not the problem itself.)

 

So lets stop watering concrete, car doors, and late-night runners.  Just because we can automate something doesn’t mean that we should, and getting a little more involved with our residences probably won’t hurt.