Sunday and animal cookies

Because I work at a newspaper, I occasionally have to work on Sundays. May is my month, where I work each Sunday for four hours, and work 9 hour days four other times during the week. It's an interesting schedule, that has both pros and cons.

However, today a serious con turned out to be Circus Animal cookies. Actually, it turned out to be a con is pro's clothing.

Apparently on Friday (when I was not working) my part of the office had an little celebration in honor of the pending Rapture. People brought treats, etc.

But when I got to the office, some of that food was still sitting out. Actually a bunch of cans of root beer and half a bag of the cookies were still siting out. Over the course of my time at work today, I have eaten most of those cookies. They aren't really good. In small quantities, they can be alright, in a nostalgic sort of way. But after handfuls and handfuls, they get pretty disgusting. I can say that, because that's what I have experienced today. I don't know why I did it, but learn from my mistake and never eat half a bag of Circus Animal cookies.

Valentine's Day Tradition

Sometimes it's fascinating how traditions emerge. This weekend Laura and I engaged in our annual Valentine's Day celebration. That includes going to Doc's Pizza Buffet in Provo, followed by attending a movie at the dollar theater.

Initially, this tradition started as a kind of parody of the holiday. A few years ago, while we were still dating, we felt like we should go do something to celebrate. However, neither of us were actually very big fans of the holiday (for the usual reasons: commercial, arbitrary, etc.). So, we decided to do the most unromantic thing we knew. We went to Doc's, which is an extremely cheap family buffet which has mediocre pizza at best, and then went and saw The Departed (an excellent, but fairly violent and wholly unromantic gangster flick).

The next year we did the same thing (I can't remember what movie we saw), thinking that it was a good way to do something together while simultaneously making fun of a pointless "holiday." In fact, we've done the same thing every year since then. It has become our tradition.

This year, as Valentine's Day approached, I was really looking forward to cheap pizza and a cheap movie. I was not, however, thinking about how our activities would satirize consumerism or artificial holidays. Basically, the original point of our "celebration" had been lost and I was just looking forward to doing something fun.

I still look down on Valentine's Day, but apparently Laura and I now have a real tradition that is a lot less ironic than I ever imagined it would be. If I'm being honest, it's probably one of my favorite holiday traditions of the year. I'm not sure what that means, other than serving as evidence that if I do something long enough, it will take on sentimental significance even if the original purpose was to satirize it.

Kill Christmas!

Ever since the holiday season began I’ve been looking forward to writing a blog about why Christmas is inferior to other holidays. However, I think I basically made my case in my Thanksgiving post (and to a lesser extent my Halloween post), so here I’m going to explain why the best way to celebrate Christmas would be to kill its so-called “spirit.”

The spirit of Christmas, as I understand it, is tied to the life of Jesus Christ. It involves being charitable, loving, and (most importantly) dwelling on the things that He provided for us. As a Christian/Mormon, I obviously think all that stuff is great. However, it’s no surprise that the way we celebrate Christmas so often has little to do with actual Christianity; we buy stuff, stress out about family gatherings, put up lights, decorate sugar cookies, etc. Of course, most of our modern Christmas traditions are actually pagan activities (Christmas trees, for example, which have nothing to do with Jesus despite Christians' attempts at appropriation).

However setting that issue aside, few Christmas activities actually promote reflection on Christian doctrine. In fact the holiday is really wrapped up in the consumerist, pop cultural side of the event. When I think of Christmas I don’t think of the gore-fest that was Jesus’ life, I think of Norman Rockwell paintings and wrapping paper. I think of How the Grinch Stole Christmas or Frosty The Snowman. I think of the pride I got as a teenager from vanquishing our neighbors in an unofficial Christmas light war. In other words, the things that I associate with Christmas are fun, happy, and (most importantly) secular.

For what it’s worth, I prefer it that way. As grateful as I am for them, I don’t really want to think of Jesus’ horrific experiences at Christmastime. I prefer to simply enjoy the pleasantness of spending time with friends and family and save the religious meditation for later. When I’m watching Christmas commercials or looking at lights, I feel a little of the holiday excitement that is supposed to accompany the season. When I think about someone being tortured to death on a cross, I just get kind of sad.

Given the origins of the word “Christmas,” it seems likely that at one point the holiday was actually a somber religious affair. However, for better or worse, that really isn’t what it’s all about anymore. We can shake our fists at the superficiality of the holiday, or we can accept it and enjoy all the secular movies, foods, activities, etc. If we wanted, we could even set aside a different day for contemplating the life of Jesus. We could spend our time thinking about Jesus’ entire life, from how awful it would be to give birth in a filthy stable to the awesome idea of resurrection, and then continue to have a sweet secular celebration on December 25th.

Whether we set aside a different day or not, it’s unlikely that Christmas will become less secular. Instead and as a result of our spending habits, it’ll probably continue to move away from the “Christmas spirit.” Fighting that fact will just constitute slapping a religious veneer on a technically pagan and effectively secular celebration. On the other hand, sweeping away that veneer would allow us to guiltlessly enjoy the simple pleasures of the season (like, say, the deliciousness of eggnog or the smell of evergreen), without extra preoccupation about sins and hell. Ultimately, it’d allow us to embrace the kitschy aesthetic of the season and open the door to a more meaningful religious holiday.

Thanksgiving: The Best Holiday of the Year

Thanksgiving is unequivocally the best holiday of the year. Though it consistently ranks below Christmas on many people’s personal holiday rankings, it deserves more credit.

 

Of course, the most obvious reason to praise Thanksgiving is the way it is celebrated. Thanksgiving is practically synonymous with food and feasts. Admittedly, if you aren’t a fan of turkey, pies, mashed potatoes, etc. (and I know many people aren’t) Thanksgiving will probably hold significantly less appeal. On the other hand, Thanksgiving food is fairly varied and most people don’t hate all the traditional dishes. More importantly, perhaps, a Thanksgiving feast provides an opportunity for creativity. This year, for example, my family and I had the typical pies but Laura and I also made banana cake. Last year someone brought sautéed mushrooms. Though these kinds of food definitely weren’t on the Pilgrims menu, they are delicious and any holiday that provides an excuse to eat good food has a lot going for it. Ultimately then, even if you don’t love Thanksgiving food, you can still use the day as an excuse to make and eat a lot of other delicious things.

 

While food is certainly a big part of Thanksgiving, I would argue that is isn’t the most important part. Instead, the most significant part of Thanksgiving is being able to spend time with family or friends. Again, I know that not everyone enjoys this part of the holiday. I also know that there are many people who can’t get together with their families. However, the fact that the Wednesday before Thanksgiving is the biggest travel day of the year suggests that celebrating with loved ones is a typical or at least common thing to do. What’s more, whether you get along with your family or not, Thanksgiving is among the least stressful ways to get together. You don’t to worry about things like presents, and the attention is never on one person as it might be during a wedding, birthday celebration, graduation, etc. 

 

There are a number of other reasons to appreciate Thanksgiving. It takes place in the fall, for example, so it’s not as cold as Christmas but it’s not as hot as the Fourth of July. It also means a day off from work for most people and two days for many (and three for students and teachers). The list could go on and on, but the point is that Thanksgiving genuinely has more to offer than most holidays.

 

Of course, Thanksgiving is also good because of the ways that it isn’t celebrated. As I mentioned above, there are no presents as there is with Christmas. Obviously if you love getting (or giving) things that might seem like a negative thing, but realistically presents raise stress. You have to find just the right thing for everyone, worry about whether they’ll like it, and then act surprised/impressed/excited about what they gave you no matter how you actually feel. Sometimes none of those things are a big deal, but other times they cause serious tensions. At very least Christmas requires everyone to put on a show and by comparison Thanksgiving comes off as a much more sincere holiday.

 

Thanksgiving also isn’t commercialized the way that Christmas or Halloween are. To be honest, the commercial aspect of Christmas is really the only part of the holiday that makes me feel the seasonal “spirit”; I can’t, for example, get into Christmas unless I’ve seen tons of Christmas commercials. However, Thanksgiving’s charm is that you don’t have to “get into” the holiday in the first place. There is relatively little buildup and, consequently, no let down when the day actually comes. As an adult I can’t stress this point enough. Though I loved Christmas as a child it is inevitably disappointing as an adult when I know that there is no magical, Santa-related ending and that the best thing that will happen is that I’ll get to sleep in. Those things are great, but hardly worthy of weeks and weeks of anticipation. Thanksgiving, by contrast, includes the best parts about Christmas without the huge anticipation and subsequent let down.

 

I could go on and on about how much better Thanksgiving is than all other holidays (in the U.S.). Instead, however, suffice it to say that in these first days of December I’m reminded of how much more thankful I am for Thanksgiving than all other holidays.

Father’s Day/A Celebration of Virility

Tomorrow is Father’s Day, so I figured it might be a good time to reflect on this day of fatherly celebration.  More specifically, I’d like to take this opportunity to explore the strange fact that Father’s Day (and Mother’s Day) seem to be more a celebration of male-ness (or female-ness on Mother’s Day) than of actual parenting. 

 

My perception of Father’s Day is inevitably influenced by the way it is celebrated at my church.  For the past few years (both when I was single and now that I'm married), I have received a gift from my ward (aka congregation).  Usually it's something small, like a candy bar or a cinnamon role.  On Mother’s Day I’ve seen women receive similar gifts, as well as things like small plants or home decorations (I’m not going to get into gender stereotyping here, though obviously it goes on).

 

The odd thing about these events, nice as they are, is that I am not a father.  When Laura has received gifts in the past it has struck me as equally odd, as of course she isn't a mother.  Indeed the typical criteria for who receives a gift is usually just being over 18 years old and of the male gender (for Father’s Day, or female gender for Mother’s Day).  While I always love to get a big candy bar, casting the celebratory net so wide seems to trivialize that actual act of parenting.  After all, if I don’t have kids what am I being congratulated for?

 

The result of this situation, and the answer to that question, seems to be that I am being honored for my sexual potential to have children.  In this case, Father’s Day becomes a celebration of male virility, while Mother’s Day becomes a celebration of female fertility.  Of course, there may be people receiving these gifts who are not physically capable of having children, but it seems like more of a theoretical celebration, as if to say, “in the ideal world we’d all be sexually potent, so have a Twix.” 

 

I’m not opposed to this turn of events, but I think we should acknowledge it for what it is.  After all, just because we don’t want people to feel bad or left out doesn’t mean that we should honor them for something they didn’t do.  Instead, lets continue to honor the male and female genders, while also acknowledging parenting and those lucky people who happen to be parents.  Perhaps we can initiate a new kind of day; it could be called Parents Day and the criteria for getting a candy bar is actually having sired a child.  Otherwise, if we do nothing, we make no distinction between parents and non-parents and accordingly suggest that those people who are raising children aren’t really doing anything more than the child-less.    

 

I don’t know how widespread this issue is.  As I mentioned above, my understanding of these holidays is inevitably informed by my church experience.  (I realize that many people probably have smaller, family celebrations and so none of this really applies.)  However, if we are going to claim to celebrate parenting, lets do that.  If not, maybe its time to change the name from Father’s Day to Male Virility Day.